Broken Boundaries: A Sweet Regency Romance Read online

  Nathaniel felt his world slipping away from him. He took Christine’s face gently in his hands and turned her towards him. "Christine, I love you. You are the one I want. I do not want an empty-headed ninny as my wife."

  He leaned in and kissed her. Why had he not kissed her years ago? What kind of a fool had he been not to stake his claim when he knew deep down he should? He was sure Christine was the only one he could ever love now. He doubted he would ever kiss another woman again. That thought gave him joy instead of sorrow.

  “But Nate,” she said breathlessly, pulling away from him with a regretful look on her face. “If I marry you, who will run the bakery? Daisy and Rose simply burn everything, and Emmeline is to marry herself soon. My parents had hoped to have a son one day, but that did not happen. There is no one to keep it all going if I am not there. All they worked for will end.”

  “I know you can do anything you put your mind to. I can have someone brought in as an apprentice to learn the baking. The shop would still be yours. I would not take that away from you.”

  “That is all well and good, but how can I marry you? I am just a commoner. I cannot run a household as large and grand as Goldington House, much less be the mistress of your London townhouse and all the other properties that belong to your family. I would be overwhelmed, and you would regret your choice given just a short time. And who would care for the girls? I will not abandon them.”

  “Christine, I have thought long and hard about this. And Daisy and Rose can also have a coming out year or two if you want them to. The girls will not have to worry about finding a husband to take care of them as I will make sure they marry well. There are many eligible young men amongst my circle, and I know of some fine young soldiers who would be delighted to meet such spirited and beautiful young ladies.”

  Nathaniel felt like he was making a mess of this proposal, but he could not help himself. He could not seem to stop himself from talking. He was too afraid she would say no if he gave her the chance. He had not thought any of this through enough it seemed. Every argument she made was real and needed consideration. In his haste to claim her and appease his own heart he had forgotten that she had needs and cares, too.

  But, he was sure that all of it could be overcome. He pulled a large square-cut ruby ring from his pocket and held it out to her. “Together we can deal with all of those things. And we will,” he assured her, as he took her hand and tried to slip it onto her finger.

  “Nathaniel, that is too much,” she gasped, pulling her hand away. “I cannot wear a ring like that in the bakery. It would get full of bread dough and sugar. Or I would certainly lose it!” Christine looked ashamed of her words immediately.

  He could almost read her mind and could see she felt foolish. Her life did not allow for lovely jewellery and a beautiful ring probably seemed too much, given that none of what was happening probably felt in the least bit real.

  “I can give you anything I feel you deserve, Christine,” Nate said solemnly. “There is nothing more important to me than you, for I do love you dearly. The time I spent away from you at the war front was treacherous. I could only think about returning to you. That is what kept me alive. Please, say yes. We can fix everything else together.”

  “Yes, Nathaniel. I will marry you. I have loved you longer than I even knew. I thought of you every day you were gone, too. And you are right, we can work out all the details later.” She took the ring from him and slipped it onto her finger. Nate took her hand, pressed his lips to her palm, and then pulled her close against his heart.

  “How will your parents take the news?” she asked as they drew apart reluctantly some time later.

  “Quite poorly, I am sure. I doubt they will be happy. Mother has invited every eligible young lady in the county and beyond to supper tonight to welcome me home. I would not be surprised if I am to be forced to make a choice on the spot,” Nate joked. But it was not so far from the truth. He was certain that his mother had firm intentions to see him wed, and soon. He had no idea how he would tell his parents that he had already made his choice. He had no idea how he would convince them there was nothing they could do to change his mind.

  He would have to tell them and let things happen from there. Though he was thrilled with his choice, he did not look forward to dealing with the consequences of choosing love.

  Chapter Fifteen

  “Your father has consumption, Nathaniel. For once could you not be difficult and do as he wishes?” Mama said pointedly, at breakfast the next morning. The supper party had been tedious, as Nate had expected, and it had become more and more clear how weak his father had become as the night wore on.

  “Dr Hollingsworth has been to see him, I presume?” Nate asked, not surprised at his mother’s reluctant revelation.

  “Yes, of course.”

  “And he is dying, is he not?”

  His mother paused, her eyes filling with tears. “He is,” she admitted sadly, her entire frame crumpling before Nate’s eyes.

  “How long does the good doctor think he has left to him?”

  “He cannot tell, but he thinks weeks, rather than months now.”

  Nate sank down on the chair beside his mother at the dining table and took her hands in his. He did not know what to say to her. His mother had so often seemed cold and aloof. It came as quite a surprise to Nate to see just how deeply she felt for her husband. “And you believe he wishes me to wed before he passes?” he said softly.

  She nodded as more tears poured from her red-rimmed eyes.

  “Do I not get a choice in the matter?” He sighed as he looked at her with compassion even has he felt determination in his bones.

  “Of course you do,” Mama said, wiping her eyes with a lace handkerchief. “You can take your pick of any young woman. Your bloodline and your wealth make you the catch not just of the county, but of the entire land.”

  “And if I do not wish to wed a lady of Society? With a title and a dowry?” Nate waited for her response.

  “Do not be silly. Who else would you choose?” his mother said derisively.

  “I do not know, perhaps a commoner,” Nate said, testing the waters.

  “Not that… woman from the bakery?” his mother sneered. Nathaniel could see her good manners and breeding kept her from calling Christine an unbecoming name. “Your father would never approve. He went to great lengths to keep you apart.”

  “I know,” Nate said coldly. He felt for his mother, and he was sad that his father was dying, but he could not let their treachery go unpunished. He would not allow them to make the sort of decision that would affect his happiness for the rest of his days. “You sent me to the war not knowing if I would return. You even ensured that I would never see so much as a single one of her letters. You cared more for your reputations than you did for your own son’s well-being.”

  His mother gasped. “You knew?”

  “Not right away, but I figured it out. I went to see Christine yesterday, and we had a long talk. In fact, I asked her to marry me,” Nate said standing up and making to leave the room. “She said yes.”

  “Your father will never allow it,” his mother hissed.

  “My father will not be alive to argue,” Nate said, and immediately wished he had not spoken such harsh words. His mother looked utterly bereft.

  “You will not inherit a thing,” she added spitefully, biting back at him the only way she knew.

  “If only you knew how little that matters to me, you would never even bother to threaten me with those consequences, Mama,” Nate said softly. “Now, I am going to see Papa. Maybe he won’t be so intractable, given the circumstances.”

  His mother’s sobs could be heard across the hallway as Nate climbed the stairs to his father’s chambers. The rooms were dark, and the curtains were pulled around the vast oak four-poster bed. Nate grabbed a stool and pulled it up close to the side, before he pulled the velvet drapes back. His father’s skin was pale and grey. “The cough sounded dreadful all night,”
he said sympathetically.

  His father nodded. “It is always worse when I do too much. Oh, my boy, I am so glad I was still here to welcome you home. I should never have sent you away. I hope you will one day forgive me.”

  “You truly mean you regret that?” Nate asked, not sure what to think or believe any longer. His mother’s reaction to his news had been as he expected, but Papa seemed to be having a last minute crisis of conscience.

  “Of course, I do. Sincerely. There are many worse things a man can do than fall in love with a village girl. You would probably have grown out of it, if we had just left you alone.”

  “I doubt it, Papa,” Nate said, remembering the way he had felt when he kissed Christine yesterday, how right holding her in his arms had been. There had never been anyone else that mattered to him the way she did, and he knew there never would be.

  “So, you fancy yourself in love,” Papa said, smothering another cough.

  Nate reached forward and helped him to sit more upright, then handed him a mug of water. His father took a couple of tentative sips, then handed it back. His eyes searched Nate’s face. “You went away a boy,” he said, finally. “And you have returned a man, with your own mind. So, what do you intend to do with it?”

  “I am going to marry Christine,” Nate said boldly.

  His father chuckled, and then choked. Nate hastened to wrap him up and to try and ease the coughing by rubbing his back. Papa grabbed at a clean rag and held it to his mouth as he coughed. In moments it was dripping with blood. Nate had seen men die of diptheria and typhoid in the camps, but to see his father so frail and so sick was heart breaking. He realised he was making things worse by being so stubborn.

  “Papa, I am sorry,” he said softly.

  “Do not be,” Papa said, when he finally managed to stop coughing and lay back against the pillows. “You are right to be so sure. You will face harder opponents than me if you go through with it. But, if you do, I would be glad if you would arrange it before I am gone. I would like to know you are cared for, and safe.”

  “You will give us your blessing?” Nate asked, incredulously.

  The duke nodded. “I have no choice but to do so. I do not suppose you know the history of my marriage to your Mama?”

  Nathaniel’s brow furrowed as he watched his father heave with another coughing fit. “It is not important, Papa. Do not concern yourself with the tale. Let us just visit together now.”

  “No. I want you to know.” His father took a deep breath and continued. “I did not want to marry your mama. My father insisted I wed her because of her bloodlines and connections. Obviously, I did as I was told.”

  “You have been happy, have you not? I have always believed you to be content.” Nate blinked and shrugged a shoulder, not certain he wanted to hear these details. Since his father was determined, he waited.

  “Eventually, yes. Your mother is a fine woman, indeed. I respect her. But she was not my first love. She was not the woman I wanted to marry. I fell in love with my father’s valet’s daughter. She was sent away to a fine school. In the end, she found a brighter future than she would have had as a servant, which she was of course destined to be.” He told the story through coughs and wheezes.

  “And you have always remembered her?” Nate asked quietly.

  “Yes. Always.”

  Nate pondered the news for a moment, not sure how he should respond to his father’s revelation that duty had been more important than his feelings as a young man about to become a duke. As it happened, he did not have to respond.

  “So you see, I have loved you dearly and understood your plight far more than you might ever imagine. And I could never deny you anything, my boy. Did you not wonder why I had to send you away? It was not because I was angry or disappointed, but it was because I feared I would be too soft. I worried that you would grow up a spoiled milksop if I indulged you as much as I desired to do.”

  “Your blessing means everything to me. I love Christine, Papa, and she is truly a remarkable woman. You would like her very much if you knew her.” Nathaniel felt his eyes well up as he watched his father smile.

  “I am sure of that, indeed.” The coughing started again and Nate knew he had to let his father rest. He was loathe to leave him. After all these years, he wanted to talk with him more. He wanted to be with him and soak in the essence of this man he had barely known.

  He had to have one last question answered. It was a simple, but important one. “But, what about Mama? Will she understand?”

  “You leave your mother to me. She will come round in time. I promise.”

  Epilogue

  The day of the wedding had dawned dry and bright. Christine still had to pinch herself, almost every hour, to convince herself that her new life was real. Her long time dream was coming true.

  When Nate had hurtled into the bakery, announcing that he had his father’s blessing and that they needed to be wed right away, she had been in the middle of serving Reverend Pottle his usual weekly selection of sweet treats. Knowing how much of a gossip the vicar was, she knew that the news would not take long to spread all over the village.

  But she did not care. For at last, Christine was allowed to shout it from the rooftops that she loved Lord Nathaniel Sheffield, heir to the duchy of Goldingshire. She had never believed in fairy tales, at least not those that ended happily ever after, yet she had never given up hope that she and Nate would someday be together, somehow.

  She could hear Emmeline’s tread on the stair and turned to smile at her sister. “Well, who would have thought you would beat me down the aisle,” Emmaline said, moving forwards to pin some of the wildflowers in her basket into Christine’s hair. Rose took up the remaining blooms and began to bind them into a pretty posy that Christine could carry down the aisle.

  “Are we truly going to live at the big house?” Daisy asked, as she brought through the glorious pearl encrusted gown that the duchess had sent down for Christine to wear. It had been her own bridal gown. With such short notice there had been little time to have anything new made up, so the dress and the duchess’ seamstress had been dispatched to ensure that everything would be perfect on the day.

  Christine was immensely humbled that the duchess would allow her to wear the gown she had worn to wed Nathaniel’s father. It was an honour she had never expected.

  “We are,” Christine assured her.

  “And none of us have to work in the bakery, ever again?” Rose checked.

  “No, we do not,” Christine said. “But, Emmeline and her husband-to-be have decided that they would rather like to run the village bakery, and I pray that my husband will not think it too demeaning if I come down and help out from time to time.”

  Emmeline grinned. Christine had promised that she would teach her and David, her beau, everything they could need to know, and Christine was sure that the girls would help out, too. The bakery was a part of who they all were, and she was determined that none of them would ever forget their parents and where they came from. She was proud to be the daughter of Kenneth and Abigail Langdon. She was proud to be a baker. And, she was proud to have attracted the love of the finest man she had ever known. She could hardly wait to be wed to her best friend, she was sure that they had a very happy future ahead of them.

  As she and the girls left the apartment and stepped out onto the street, Christine was delighted to see how many of their neighbours and friends had closed their shops, and stayed home from the fields, to see her wed. They walked behind her, as she made her way to the church on the green, and they filed into the church, hugging and kissing her fondly as they bustled past to take their places in the pews at the rear of the church.

  Christine barely knew any of the faces in the front pews. They were filled with Nate’s friends and family. Briefly, Christine felt a flutter of sheer panic as she looked at them, wondering if she would ever be able to fit in amongst their kind. But when she looked down towards the altar, and saw Nate waiting for her, she knew she
had nothing to fear. They would never be a conventional couple, nor would they lead conventional lives. But, in many ways, thanks to Nate’s impeachable position in Society, he could do whatever he wished and there were few men higher to cast aspersions to his choices. As she made her way towards him, Christine knew that at last she was whole.

  As they said their vows, nobody looked prouder than the duke himself, and when she was formally introduced to her mother and father-in-law after the ceremony, she was surprised to find that they were willing to welcome her into their hearts and their lives. She had been thankful for Nathaniel’s mother’s offer of her wedding gown, but she had no idea it was more than a gesture of surrender.

  Christine immediately trusted Nathaniel’s mama. So much so, that when there was a brief pause in the proceedings and everyone seemed to be looking to her, Christine had turned to the duchess. “I do not know what I am supposed to do?” she whispered anxiously.

  “You are to gracefully walk to stand in front of your husband, dip a deep curtsey and wait for him to raise you up,” the duchess said.

  “I have never been that elegant,” Christine said nervously. “Just ask Nate… Nathaniel… Lord Sheffield,” she stuttered, not really knowing how she was supposed to address him now. It had been confusing enough before and they had never stood on formalities or proper Society rules.

  “I do not think he minds one bit,” the duchess said with a jovial smile. “Whether you are elegant, or what you call him.”

  Christine smothered a chuckle. For all her initial frostiness, and her understandable fears, she was turning out to be a staunch ally. Following her mother-in-law’s direction, she moved as gracefully as she could to drop down into a curtsey before her husband. Nate raised her up immediately. “We are equals, my darling, as we have always been. I love you,” he whispered as behind them his father rose a little unsteadily to his feet.